I bet many of you are using point and reward system as one of your parenting tools. I have always been a little reluctant to try out this system on my kids fearing that they would only have positive behaviour and attitude for the sake of the points and rewards but recently, I tried.
We tried for about two weeks and I gave up. Yes, the kids were more obedient, doing things without being told but only for the sake of gaining points. When they did not do something in the list and I refused to give them points for it, they started to feel sad, especially my daughter. She couldn't accept that she did not get the points and asked that I give her a chance to redo. Well, rules are rules. If we set a rule meant to be broken, then, it's not a rule anymore. She would cry non-stop and I thought to myself, "Is this the result I want to see in my kids?" The answer is a big NO.
Well, there are many other ways to train the kids. If this system doesn't work on them, I'll just have to explore more and find a suitable one.
2 comments:
After a while the points system doesnt work as the children just tire of it. Just go with the flow!
Hi Jo-N,
My child Psychiatrist and Therapist also advised me to apply the reward system in motivating the kids.
Nowadays seems every where including education centres also use this system.
I wonder whether it works or not! I apply it on and off.
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